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demos

by HIKING

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1.
I'm bleeding from my nose on the brand new couch Wondering if the stain will ever come out I try to stop it, but it's coming like a flood Baptism in my own unholy blood It covered all the parts I was and held them together Was it the same on that December morning A nosebleed in my mother taking form Red and ready to be born and remembered forever I was gone until I wasn't But I'll be gone again for good I thank God that there's no heaven Because I wouldn't do it even if I could I'm bleeding from my nose on the brand new couch On my knees with my head in the fucking clouds I wonder what will happen when I die Blood pouring from my nose and brown eyes Until there's nothing left inside And I crumble together There's no denying that I'm still my mother's son Baptism in her own infected blood It covered all the parts I was and held them together
2.
Humming like cathedrals in the gray They move too slow to see I've been watching them religiously My eyes climb their slick sides I break my neck to see the sky Shivering in banks and concrete rooms We're quietly alive, preparing our downtown tombs A bird is crying lonely in its tree I recognize the song, but it's sharp language is lost on me I miss the sounds I didn't know I loved The mower and the twilight bugs The yellow finches and passing trucks I need to drink my fill straight from a creek And become the Licking River And if Rose Run forgot her second son I pray that she remembers
3.
Feels like my chest is October, each leaf a passing note They pile up like an organ, pushing music through my throat I make friendly conversation so I don't feel alone But I don't talk about what I might know And I try not to think about what I don't I break apart when you see me waking up like colored glass You smile soft like an open window, morning blooming from your laugh Water's pouring from the stone now, your voice is a holy staff Dark red sound interrupting the black Your quiet whisper telling me to come back I was terrified and angry when you found me in our room You tried holding me together but I unfolded like a wound You cut your palm like we were brothers and we both howled at the moon I never really, truly prayed before you But now everything we say comes true

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released May 25, 2019

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HIKING Louisville, Kentucky

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